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Indigo Vales

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Indigo Vales

Monthly Archives: September 2015

September 23rd

23 Wednesday Sep 2015

Posted by Kristine in Uncategorized

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Writing goals for the week:

Re-do business cards.

Prepare new poems and repair old ones for the chapbook. Deadline is between Oct and December.

Today is Mabon, a special day to look back on the days of light. Look forward to the coming dark and cold nights, keeping a candle close. Ask what will I sacrifice for my own growth.

I choose to honor this day, what it meant twenty years ago,  and who knows what it will mean next year.  But today, I will reflect on family, friendships, and what the good things were on that day.

Parts and Pieces

18 Friday Sep 2015

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evolving, goals, thoughts

Renderings that come from what’s going on inside.

Goal for the end of the month: Put together poems for chapbook contest. Looking forward to seeing what I can come up with. Reading on the past makes me squeamish, actually. Was I really that person there, in those words, in that moment? And how did I come to be here today, the one who can’t sleep but gets up and drinks lukewarm coffee in the mornings surfing the net for news, for a laugh with Fallon, who watches the clock for the work day to begin, who is afraid to touch South (that is, emotion)  because of everything that lies there? I will have to go back there, to bring these poems to life again, get strong with them, and launch them forward. Otherwise, they lay flat on a page in a dusty file folder.  What else are they there for, why else did I write it? Was it all cathartic, or is there something more there?  That’s the trick, to find out.

I am present, I am here with me in this real, in this quiet house. Only now have I learned how to breathe from a centered place and look forward, actually see it, and although it is scary, I am ready.  What renderings are yet to come, what horrific lonely sunrises will I write about then?  Too soon to say from 9:08 on a September morning, but at least I know I’m in charge of the words I put on that page.

Another goal:  re-do my business cards in 12-point, dammit!

September 15

15 Tuesday Sep 2015

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not writing, reading

Not really in the right mental space to create, so I do believe today is going to be a reading day.  And what shall she read, today, Girls and Boys?  “Boating For Dummies,” The Sun Magazine, and “The Ultimate Weird Tales of Clark Ashton Smith.”

Schwing! Submission!

15 Tuesday Sep 2015

Posted by Kristine in Uncategorized

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Bonewitch, Flash fiction, goals, guidelines, submitted

Notes from the desk of Indigo Vales:  Flash fiction piece finished, Flash fiction piece submitted.  The first time it didn’t go through because a certain someone , little Ms. Attention To Details, didn’t notice the file had to be in rich text, not a Word document.  Ahem…   so on my lunch break from work I took a closer look at the GUIDELINES, FOLLOWED THE INSTRUCTIONS, and this time it went through.

I am excited by this process, something I hope to keep doing and with more frequency.

Perhaps my next post will be Schwing!  Accepted!

9/16 update: Got the “received” letter and “do not query before” date.  Yay!

Thoughts On This September Day

11 Friday Sep 2015

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destiny, goals, horoscope, never forget

Good morning.  I sleep better after he leaves for work, so I returned to sweet (illicit) dreams, but then awoke to remembering what today is.  And my exhausted son overslept, but he got himself out the door.   The morning began a little sideways, but perhaps today is the right day to feel sideways. Tilted. On unfirm footing.

Nothing is certain right now, for me anyway, and my Jyotish horoscope certainly agrees with how this feels.   You might say, “What? Oh come on, you don’t believe that crap do you?” And I will say “Yes. I do believe that the carbon-based units (thank you Star Trek) on this planet are influenced by our genes, our ancestors, our birth order, and where this planet is in relation to the rest of the Universe. We are certainly influenced by things outside our control, and I look at horoscopes with interest, but not for hard and fast truths. Sometimes it coincides with my life, sometimes not. In the end, it’s all up to me.”

This September day is overcast.  The sky is not turquoise like it was on that day, fourteen years ago. I remember walking outside to see if there were any planes flying at all, after I heard the news.  We might get more rain today. I sure would like to stay home and write in the pouring rain, but I will probably be at the store slinging auto parts when the rain falls. I shooed away the wee temptation to skip work and stay home to write, but I am closing the store tonight and that means be there, or else.

I am tempted to clean out my closet and office because it will be productive, and yet have nothing to do with writing. I come up with all kinds of things to take me off track and it’s an illness many creatives suffer.  I recognize it, name it, and now I will put a stop to it by saying I have a writing goal for next week, September 22nd, to submit both pieces of recent flash fiction.  I’ve already dealt with a tardy teenager, read the news, journaled, and stated a goal.  And now, we’re off.

Face the morning. Breathe. Reflect. Love. Seek the horizon.

9/14 update:  Submitted piece today.  Yay!

Here There Be Dragons

11 Friday Sep 2015

Posted by Kristine in Uncategorized

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Bonewitch, destiny, evolving, inspiration

Somehow, I can manage to think now. I can look for truth, allow it in.  Somehow, now, I can look forward and know it’s ok to be afraid.  And today I wrote. I finished the story of Bonewitch and I am very happy with the way it came out.  Tonight I discovered that every thing I write won’t be the last thing I write. There’s more, there will be plenty more to come if I keep at it.  If I can open my heart/mind/soul and let beauty, peace, and joy come in.

This morning I had the idea that I will do something I fear because I am ready for it now. Well, I am open to the idea of it, and ready to consider the fear and what it means to me.  I am ready to leave sight of land. I want to sail East, away from here, instead of South alongside land.

Today I decided not to wait for someone to ask me things. I will be the hunter instead, and perhaps I will fail. I’ll get a negatory and will have to move on, and that is just fine with me. It’s better than waiting and not knowing. I’m tired of waiting and not knowing.

The mappa says “Here there be dragons.” This morning I recognized I am afraid to swim with them because they will eat me, but now I am ready to consider that fear and write about them. How else can I join them in their weightless wonder?  164726__storm-in-the-sea_p

Chapbook Manuscript Blues

07 Monday Sep 2015

Posted by Kristine in Uncategorized

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Tags

chapbook, Chuck Wendig, goals, poetry

This morning, it’s the kind of feeling you get when you look at the garden you tried to grow and see that it’s quite a mess. I mean, it was half-hearted, really. You meant well, but you didn’t give it everything a garden needs to really look like something that was destined for the cover of Lawn & Garden. But is that what you really wanted? To be on the cover? Or did you just want to spend some time outdoors, away from a computer screen or beneath fluorescent lights, hands covered in earth instead of axle grease? What was the thinking behind tearing open a spot of land on the side of the house that sees a lot of sunlight, making rows and dropping in seeds? What were you thinking when you watched for shoots to rise from the earth, hoping to see tender green, when all that arrived was breathless, pale strangers?  You brought water and weeded intermittently, as you were rather preoccupied. (At least, not as preoccupied as last year, but that’s a tale meant for some other garden.)  So here you are with an ugly tomato and a green pepper that would certainly be finalists for Ugliest Vegetables of the Year.   You wash the dirt off the tomato, sprinkle on a little salt, and take a bite of pulpy seeds and firm skin. The land yielded a veggie good enough for you, but not enough to share with anyone else. Was it worth the effort? Does the land speak to you loudly enough to encourage you to try again?  Will garden and gardener establish a bond and create (a poem) good enough to share?

This morning, it’s how I feel about what my writing life looks like thus far. I look at the pretty box labeled “Poetry” and know deep down I’ve got no business compiling it and sending it off for review.  I feel like a woman at the starting line, waiting for the submission deadline gun to go off knowing I am surrounded by real runners whose heels I am going to study all the way to the finish line, and once I get there I’m going to be drop dead on the line, calling out for my inhaler and a beer, saying “Tell me again why I got into this thing?”

I ask myself, can I create, magically spin a pile of poems that resemble art in time for the deadline? Can a writer “art harder” and win?  How dare I even think about opening that earth and dropping in a seed, or stand on the starting line? I’m going to dare because nothing will grow otherwise.  Wish me luck.  Wish me Truth. Wish me Authenticity. Wish me Art, muthas!  

Bonewitch

06 Sunday Sep 2015

Posted by Kristine in Uncategorized

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Tags

Bonewitch, Flash fiction, HoW, progress, prompt

The goddess wants me to tell you the story of the witch who lives in the blue school bus.

I hope tonight I will dream her whole life, and find the words ready to write in the morning.

9/7 Update: Her name is Bonewitch.  And she learns her sidekick’s true name upon giving her last breath.

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